IT'S TIME TO STOP ALL THE MADNESS LADIES

Ladies... I need to deal with ya'll today.. I have seen so much compromise going on amongst us.. it has been heavy on my heart for quite some time to address this.. so here I go..

Ladies.. first off stealing someone elses man is first a bad seed to sow but second a bad start. How can you ask God to bless a relationship that started on deceit, lies, and pain? Its not possible. So here you are now with a man that you stole from someone else.. and yes the saying is OH SO TRUE if he cheated with you he will cheat on you.. dont think your exempt from this. Ladies a man wont change for you. It has to come from within and if you think stealing him from her and then thinking he is gonna change is gonna work..you're setting yourself up for heartache. Not only that... You will constantly be insecure.. yes you may no think you will be but it will creap up on you.. you are gonna feel guilty you took him froms omeone else and the whole time conciously or not you're gonna think he's cheating... DUH HE CHEATED WITH YOU.. yes sis he's gonna cheat on you..

Second ladies.. this division between us HAS GOT TO STOP... This has been an ongoing topic between Isaiah and myself in the last few days.. There is so much division between women.. it's disgusting.. why are you hating? Cause she has everything you wanted? WELL only YOU are stopping YOU From having it.. STOP HATIN on everyone elses favor gifts anointings and blessings. If you would stop all that you might be able to see that God has something for you as well. This race division is rediculous.. it really is.. just because I am not black does not I WILL REPEAT DOES NOT mean that I cant date a black man. AND IF I CHOOSE to date a black man I should not have to hear things being said like "I cant believe you would date a white girl" or here how about this one.. "You're an educated black man I never thought you would actually date a white girl" ARE YOU SERIOUS?? Is that the attitude you're carrying around? Tell me where God sees color? PLEASE TELL ME WHERE HE SAYS BLACKS AND WHITES AND ASIANS AND HISPANICS AND PACIFIC ISLANDERS etc should NOT DATE... you cant.. because those statements aren't godly they are stupid and ignorant. Those thoughts and ways of thinking are stopping many women from having relationships. Do you understand that? I have homegirls.. that look at guys and see the girl he's dating and will say... why would he date her she's not even cute... WHAT??? If that man chooses to look beyond the skin and inside then I give him MAJOR props. Then you have these females that are so bitter that they just want everyone else to join their bitter party.. NO WAY not me.. I escaped bitterness I will NOT fall back into all that.

Bitterness can take root in a womans soul and never let her go. She walking around mad at everyone.. It doesn't matter what they did.. they coulda brought her flowers and she says they aren't good enough.. HONEY if you dont make yourself happy.. no one around you is gonna make you happy. You need Jesus and a huge dose of him QUICK...

Then there's these women that think they are better then everyone else.. They put on a holy front but when they are alone.. their soul is exposed.. then they have to try harder on twitter fb and behind other network sites to put up this front that they are saved and virtuous.. ummm HOLD UP.. what part of virtuous is SHOWING YOUR CLEAVAGE??? Now dont get me wrong I like to feel good and I like to look cute but I dont put myself out there like that. FIRST off us as women are to dress in a way that glorifies God AND isn't suggestive... girl if you are dressed in a way to get men to look at you your intentions are all WRONG... Yes we are wrong too if a man is lusting after us because we allowed for a titties to hand out of our shirts.. YOU'RE JUST AS WRONG... get it together...

We as women have to do better.. WE HAVE TO... a lot of us are single parents.. our kids are looking to us as mommy and daddy.. and we are showing them that it's okay to be this fast lil girl and this playa lil boy. ITS NOT OK... We need to be bringing up little girls.. who hold onto their innocence that Love God so much that they honor him with their bodies.. Little boys need to know how to lead their families and rely on God not go out here and sell drugs and get in trouble.. It's gotten so out of hand..

The division amongst women is rediculous.. there's a racial divide there's a spiritual divide.. it's dumb.. and we need to stop it.. we need to stop empowering women to be these crazy out of control women.. and start empowering women to go back to our roots... the origins... where God really wanted us to be.. virtuous... proverbs 31 women...

It's up to us to stand together.. not women power... but virtuous women power...

that is all.. sorry if I offended anyone.. if I did.. that's probably a sign that you fit one of these categories.. lets talk.. I want to pray for you!!

THE "INDEPENDENT" WOMAN

For all the ladies proclaiming their "independence" with unbreakable confidence please read below to understand how YOU are ruining your interactions with men.Independent= not relying on another or others for aid or support. rejecting others' aid or support; refusing to be under obligation to others possessing a competency: to be financially independent. sufficient to support a person without his having to work: an independent income executed or originating outside a given unit, agency business, etc.; external: an independent inquiry working for oneself or for a small, privately owned business. expressive of a spirit of independence How does independence relate to men & marriage? Simple! Independence is the antonym of the "unity" a marriage requires to survive & women have vehemently proclaimed their right &"love" for their "independence" Hence we have: -a high divorce rate in this country -women can't keep men for a long period of time because men aren't tolerating the self- centeredness of independence -women claim there are no good black men when the real issue is that men are turned off by the aggressiveness,over opinionated confrontational, authoritative challenging, macho residual behaviors of independent women -most single women are single mothers by CHOICE VIA INDEPENDENCE & men avoid these women because of all the insane baggage associated with dealing with single mothers -bitter angry women especially single mothers feeling duped by their blind allegiance to independence.....

How To Lose A Man As Fast As You Got Him

He's such a jerk.. He played me.. I didn't deserve this.. I'm not that bad of a girlfriend.... WHY?? This is something I hear so too often from women who have a bad break up... BUT GIRLS lets just keep it real for a second.. Sit down self examine. What is it that you were doing. Evaluate your fights.. what were they about?

Let me school you on a few things that really bother guys... even if you dont think it does..

Clinginess... a guy wants to feel needed but he doesn't want to feel like if he goes out with his boys you will lose your mind....

Insecurity... Now chances are you put up a front to get this guy interested if you're insecure.. because most guys wont even go towards an insecure woman she has a huge red flag waving above her head.. so since you put up a front to get him someday the true you will come out you cant hide insecurities forever...
going thru his phone his email his facebook... INSECURE
having something to say about every female he is associated with INSECURE
calling 27 times and texting 53 while he's out with his boys for 4 hours INSECURE

Inability to communicate.. Now ladies you might think men are brainless and only care about football and sex.. BUT THAT IS SO WRONG... men desire a woman that can come to him and express how shes feeling about certain things. Men do desire to fix the issues.. so communication is so necessary. Men are not mind readers if you dont tell them they wont know. So getting mad and screaming and yelling at him is just going to confuse him more and turn him completely off from being in a relationship.

NAGGING him to death... look ladies... nagging a man is one of the worst things you can do.. it's a sure bet he will leave you. Lets just keep it real you dont want to be nagged all day do you? You dont want someone complaining about how you live your life everytime you turn around. Everytime you guys get together your man is complaining.. NOPE so why do it? Even the bible tells us a few things about nagging
Proverbs 21:9 It is better to live in a corner of the housetop than in a house shared with a quarrelsome wife(even tho your not his wife you get the idea)
Proverbs 27:15 A continual dripping on a rainy day and a quarrelsome wife are alike
Proverbs 21:19 It is better to live in a desert land than with a quarrelsome and fretful woman
I think you get the point.. STOP NAGGING THAT MAN... or he's gonna leave it's just a matter of time.

TRUST IS A MUST... look if you cant trust a man because of what men have done to you in the past you need to STOP... and save this man from the drama you are about to bring into his life. Its up to you to heal from your past before you can enter into something else. Trust also goes along with insecurity... checking his phone emails fb all of it stems from a lack of trust and insecurities. Honestly sis you have no right to be in a relationship right now. That may sting but you need to let God do some work in you and if this man you're dating is the one then he will wait for you TRUST GOD!!

Negative Attitudes...YES even this wears on a mans nerves. He doesn't want to hear your negativity all the time. If your life is so horrible why dont you stop what you're doing and CHANGE... This also includes a lack of desire to become a better person.. none of us can ever stop growing we can always become better and once you get the attitude that you're where you want to be you have lost. No man wants to hear you talk bad about everything in your life.

If the stress out weighs the rewards of the relationship chances are a REAL MAN is not going to stay. He knows his worth he knows that God will reward him for his obedience and a nagging negative insecure non trusting wife is not what God is going to give him. You may be able to throw your money at him or your body, BUT this will not keep him. TRUST ME if you have the mentality that your sex game is gonna keep a man happy you are SO wrong. It may keep him interested in a booty call but as soon as something better looking comes along he will leave you for her. He may call some night that he cant get ahold of his other chic. LADIES know your worth.. Dont be this bitter broken woman that continuously loses every man she dates and sends a piece of herself with him. What I have learned is this.. if you keep it pure and you keep it how God intended you wont lose a piece of you if it comes about that GOD says this isn't what I had for you. IF you haven't given a piece of your soul you have kept it real.. you wont send a piece of yourself. You know a man and a woman who have dated can come to a mutual decision that this isn't what the Lord has for either of us and we cant pursue a romantic relationship but hey since we haven't slept together we dont have a soul tie we can be friends and maybe God intended for something else to come out of our coming together!!! Anyone who says you cant be friends is a liar. God didn't intend for us to go around sleeping with everyone and giving a piece away so that at the end of the day we're mad. NO he intended for us to bring glory to his kingdom... Ladies stop letting your emotions run you and if you're in a place where you cant get control of these things you have no business dating.. slow down let God do his work in you so you're better prepared!!!

Breaking up doesn't have to be a bad thing. It can be a growth thing. A learning experience but as long as you remain bitter and broken you will never learn and if you cant learn you cant grow... I love you all!!!


T.I.A.
TRUTH.IN.ACTION

Big shoutout to the guys who gave me their opinions... Michael Pittman, Qasim Mitchell, Pastor Stephen Thompson, Dwight Nash, Bangloose, Mark Laturtue, and Steve Johnson!!! You guys rock thanks for keeping it REAL!!!

Why I Have Chosen Celibacy

The best sex is blessed sex WAIT FOR MARRIAGE!! #TeamCelibate.. a lot of you see me say this a lot!! Now the reasons I have chosen to be celibate!!!

I have been having sex since I was 15. There isn't much I haven't done in the realm of sex.. EXCEPT wait!! See I cant get my virginity.. my purity and neither can you, but what you can do is choose from this day forward to be CELIBATE to refrain from sexual activity until your wedding day! Now although you're not a virgin (assuming you're not) God can still bless your sex! Repent for the sex you have had now and pray to him to break the soul ties you have acquired along the way.

Celibacy is hard.. you have to get to a place that God is fullfilling enough for you to fight the urges. You have to keep yourself from situations that you would normally fall victim to those sexual encounters. Personally I dont find myself alone with a man for long periods of time and after a certain time of the day. Although sex can happen during the day you're more likely to engage in it at night when the mood is right LOL.. how corny but really... I know a lot of believers who safe guard themselves by not being with their boyfriend or girlfriend past a certain time of day.

Now personally I have chosen celibacy because of my own convictions. God has delivered from the pits of hell literally satan and I were on first name basis. I was having men lust after me in strip clubs engaging in sex in the "vip" room.. oh yeah by the way.. sex really does happen in the champagne room... for the right amount of money any girl in that club would have sex.. and since it was the most upscale club in houston... sheeks, princes, CEO's, Politicians, Rappers, Athletes, anyone who could actually afford it could have sex... now fast forward... God convicted me and showed me that this is where I would minister to people.. but how could I be having sex and minister to girls and tell them what it would do to them.. isn't that hypocritical???????? Duh Tia thats the point you cant witness to anyone while you're engaging in sexual activities.. that's when I had to make a choice what was more important my salvation or sex? I chose to follow God and the convictions of my heart.

So here I am celibate and the longer and longer I go I get more excited.. I no longer have the urge to masturbate or watch porn.. Sex isn't even on my mind and if I do think about it I think about how exciting my wedding night is going to be becaues it's going to be blessed...by the creator of it My God!!!!

Celibacy was a hard choice because I was so sexually active and actually I craved it.. but not only did God deliver me from it he took away the urges!! I know that if he can do it for me he can do it for anyone!! People ask me all the time aren't you afraid of losing a man cause you wont have sex with him.. UM NO... I'm afraid of losing my salvation if I do have sex with a man. IF a man cant wait and wont wait until marriage then he is not the man for me. No man is worth my salvation.. and no woman should worth you "guys" that are out there having sex. It's not just your salvation it's your heart, your soul, your health (mental and physical). If you think that having sex doesn't affect any of those areas you are being deceived and fooled. I urge you to at least consider the benefits of celibacy.

Here are a few
You can pray for your soul ties to be broken
You will get closer to God
You wont feel the pressures to "perform"

that's just 3 but personally I have clarity I dont have a lot of opposite sex stress I find my comfort in God instead the arms of a man that eventually leave. Celibacy has so many rewards!! And think about it!! Your wedding night sex will be AMAZING.. blessed by the creator of it.. YEAH HOW CAN YOU GO WRONG??

Just my 3 cents lol... God Bless

LADIES LADIES LADIES... let him go

LADIES... I've finally realized a lot thru my 28 years and many relationships that just haven't worked... some not my fault.. some were.. but what I've realized is this..

You cant make a man stay.. worldly or Godly men are men and once their mind is made up.. they are leaving it's just a matter of time. You cant change a mans mind. If he wants to go LET HIM. Holding onto him is just causing yourself more pain. TRUST ME..

Begging a man to stay is showing him that you can be an option if what he's leaving you for doesn't work out. That you will be there if what he's chasing fails. It leaves you hurting and vulnerable and if you do take him back he will just leave you again for another option. It's not fair dont do it. Dont beg a man to stay. If he wants to go let him go.

I know they say fight for what you want, BUT if what you want doesn't want to be fought for.. DONT FIGHT .. why fight a battle that you cant win. LOOK I know it sounds all romantic and right to say I fought for this with everything I have but he isn't gonna respect that. LET HIM GO...

Relationships are hard and if both parties aren't willing to fight for what God has brought together then LET IT GO.. it is true that any door God has opened man cant shut BUT God doesn't force us to be in relationships actually he doesn't force us to do anything... what he does is give up the chance... if a man doesn't want to make it work.. sorry sis.. GOD ISN'T GONNA FORCE HIM you have to just LET HIM GO...

No woman wants to hear this.. she wants to hear it's gonna be okay.. it's gonna work out just keep fighting... WHY? WHY fight for something that is not in your hands?? If he wants to go just let him go. SIS it will save you heartache in the long run. The momentary heartache it hurts it really does because you gave so much of yourself and you feel like how could he walk away if he loves me. Doesn't he understand how bad it hurts. MOST LIKELY no he doesn't.. that's why it's so easy for him to turn around and walk away...

If a man wants to go let him and dont sit around waiting for him to come back. He's not sitting around waiting on you. NO he's out living and loving.. so it's your turn go live and love.. dont lose yourself in a man. Men are temporary God is forever... God will fix your broken heart and eventually it wont hurt anymore and you will move on...

JUST WORDS OF ADVICE FROM MEEEE

WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME OR TELL ME WHERE THE LORD HAS PLACED ME??

You know.. it's so true that with breakthroughs come attacks from the devil... and he does this because he sees we're growing and I must say today has been going wonderful and then someone attacked me.. and the thing that bothers me is that it happens so to often in the church and among believers..

See this person said things to me like "some of us have been married longer then you've been saved who are you to give advice on marriage" they did this hiding behind an anonymous formspring message.. Now I cant appreciate or respect that.. and to many not just me it's an obvious attack of the enemy which is sad becaue he's actually using another believe to try and remove me from what the Lord has for me... but I say this because so too often we as believers are attacked from fellow believers it's sad...

There is nothing in the bible that says man chooses what the Lord appoints.. And if I'm wrong then um someone please tell me and show me in the bible.. Nowhere does it say that your amount of time being saved reflects the work you will be called to do in the kingdom.. GOD uses everyone and he has a time and season that he uses them. For someone to come to another brother or sister and tell them you shouldn't be speaking of this is wrong. Why would you at anytime want to hinder what the Lord is doing why would you attack your brother or sister who is only doing what the Lord has called her to do. I can understand a person trying to give correction in an area but that comes from love.. not attack and you cant ever tell someone what their job in the kingdom is. I have a close enough relationship with the Lord that I know what I've been called to do.

What I'm getting at is the sadness that is brought on my heart towards these people who profess to be saved yet they are not showing it. Attacks are not from God... plain and simple. Its a sad reality that some of must face due to my past and me being so OPEN AND TRANSPARENT I'm going to face these attacks by lukewarm Christians.. and it's sad because these kinds of people are who keep our brothers and sisters from being transparent and open which is what God calls us to do. Yes I admit openly I dont know everything. No I haven't been saved for 20 years... But what I am is a walking talking example of what God does. What he places on my heart and what he has prepared me for is what I am doing... But I encourage you if you're attacking a brother or sister because you're mad check yourself... You're hindering Gods glory and the work to be done for his kingdom luckily I would never let someone like that bother me because I know but unfortunetly for some believers who aren't as strong.. will be turned away because of people like that.. I'M JUST SAYING the truth hurts and for some they cant accept it especially not from someone who has been saved for only a small time....